It is easy to get trapped in feelings of emotions. Have you ever felt stuck, like things will always be the way they currently are? I had an insight recently that helped me to see this differently.
(more…)Feelings are Never Permanent
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It is easy to get trapped in feelings of emotions. Have you ever felt stuck, like things will always be the way they currently are? I had an insight recently that helped me to see this differently.
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This week I listened as leaders shared deep core fears they hold. There were fears of not belonging, not being loved. Fears not being safe or secure. Fears of rejection and judgment. As we discussed these fears and wrestled with them insights started to emerge.
The fears that they carry are getting in the way of the next best action they need to take to make progress in their life. The fear is driving their behavior.
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At a leadership development event I was hosting I took some time to reflect on what I am called to do. The event was at a golf course, and I was looking out over the course and I saw various holes. Each hole has its own obstacles, terrain, and challenges.
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Awhile back I wrote about boundary conditions and how when we expand our boundary conditions, we can find greater growth.
I am one that does not like to show too much emotion. All my life I have been steady, not too hot and not too cold. This has served me well in many things, but it has meant that I have a narrow range of emotions and it is limiting to me and impacts the way I connect with others.
In a recent class with leaders at Microsoft I pushed against my boundary conditions.
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The boom of AI has changed the way people all around us are seeing the world. This is not another thought about AI, and not even one about trusting AI but rather on the impact of speed and cost on making the progress we want to make as leaders.
I learned from Steven M.R. Covey a simple idea about trust that became real to me as I pondered the age of AI and the pace of innovation. The idea is that trust accelerates progress (and business) and there is a simple heuristic we can follow to assess the level of trust in our families, communities, teams, or organizations.
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There is no one way to build a leadership development program but there are key ideas and thoughts that we do not want to forget when designing one. I’ll share with you one of them here.
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Building and strengthening your own leadership and the leadership of others is not an easy task. It requires focus, intentionality, and most often a mindset shift.
The beginning of this mindset shift for me happened right after college. I was working for a serial entrepreneur who taught me about Don Clifton and the early days of positive psychology. He had the following research question after finding there were mountains of research studies about how to “fix” psychological challenges we all face in life.
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Sometimes when I am talking to someone, I will have an image come to my mind that illustrates for me an idea or concept. This happened to me last week while talking to a good friend across the pond.
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One of my favorite things to do is go on a walk with my wife and son during my lunch break right before we put my son down for a nap. On a recent walk he joined us on his scooter.
As he rode ahead of us, he would look back to make sure we were still there. The moment he started to look back his scooter began to drift. He felt the swerve, looked forward, adjusted himself and then almost immediately looked back only to drift again.
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Research done by Princeton psychologists Janine Willis and Alexander Todorov states that it takes no longer than 100 milliseconds to form an impression of a stranger from their face.
Within a tenth of a second we are making judgments and forming first impressions. We are judgment making machines.
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I teach and invite people to act. Proud husband, father and amateur pizzaiolo