My Dad has always been someone I look up to and aspire to be like. In our home he was always constant. The world may be crashing around us and he would be calm, optimistic, and always emotionally stable and strong.
Naturally, I want to be like him, and I modelled my behavior after him. When I feel an emotion I do not like, I have trained my brain to look for the good. I consider this one of my superpowers and it has served me well in my life.
Weakness is anything that gets in the way of excellence. I have discovered in looking to emulate my Dad I have gone too far and do not often give myself permission to feel things that I judge to be negative. Doing this gets in the way of me being vulnerable and inhibits my ability to connect with others.
My thinking error is this; I perceived certain feelings to be “bad”. Feelings are not good or bad – they are just feelings. Both feelings and emotions come and go as a natural part of living. I am working on not judging my feelings and taking time to feel things when they come and then to let them go. The emotion wheel has helped me to learn to be better about recognizing my feelings.
Learning to identify and accept feelings is hard. When you and I can accept what feelings come and then be honest with ourselves about those feelings we can connect with people with empathy.
This week, write down in your journal, what you are feeling each day. Use the emotion wheel if it helps. I hope a week is enough for you to build some momentum.
I have been trying every day for the last several months to write down my feelings and I am making progress. If you are intentional about improving your ability to recognize and label your feelings. I am confident you will learn faster and be better at connecting with more people. Consistency is key.
